Bringing a Vision of Market

I was so inspired that I could see the entire vision of the dolls. Images of women having dolls sitting at their offices or bedrooms -- I could see mothers and daughters playing with realistic, teaching dolls.

I immediately contacted an attorney friend, Trudy Reeves, who had attended one of my self-esteem meetings for completion of a business plan. (She did a business plan for a famous basketball player). I found a doll lady to make the original dolls. My daughter sketched the first dolls, along with each body type. This was a personal journey for her and one that came from her heart and her triumph through the pain she had suffered so many years ago.

The first doll designer couldn’t meet my daughter and my standards. Beth searched for another artist. She learned of Chris Love in Carmel Valley. Chris was a sculptress who was familiar with mythology. She and her partner worked for Steven Spielberg and were experienced in developing exquisite designs and molds.

At first we were going to call them Creator Dolls, then the Original Goddess Dolls, Born on Mount Olympus. Finally I was inspired to call them SophiaDolls™. The name Sophia comes from the Greek word for wisdom. This name shall always represent the knowing of true inner wisdom for all girls and women.

So I was ready to go. The wisdom dolls were based on a unique concept that met a profound market need in both women and young girls. I had developed a detailed business plan, created sketches of the dolls, and found an artist to bring the goddesses to life. Now all I had to do was learn the doll making business and find financial funding to get us off the ground. It couldn’t be that difficult!

The Formation of a Vision

I uncover some shocking information! In July 1998, ABC and PBS presented documentaries on the influence of the Barbie doll on society. During the PBS Point of View documentary, Barbie Nation, girls under 10-years-old were shown playing with Barbies. These girls believed that if they “were not at least a little bit pretty (like Barbie), people wouldn’t like them and they wouldn’t have any friends.” In this same program, an art student related her story of bulimia. She wanted her thighs to appear like Barbie’s. She felt that her body became her enemy as she tried to become “perfect.” However, if Barbie were a real woman, she would probably have to walk on all fours based on her proportions.

I had been talking to women about their unique shapes and how they don’t honor their bodies. I thought to myself, why doesn’t someone come up with a doll that has more of a woman’s shape? Why not have seven dolls represented by the Greek goddesses, each dressed in unique costumes, with distinct personality qualities and body shapes to be used as teaching tools and role models for young girls?

I presented my idea to my retreat group and received a resounding, “Yes”! They would love to have a doll to represent personality archetypes and their different body shapes and would love their little girls to play with them. Something within me told me that I MUST do it!

The Birth of an Idea

Gone were the days of the corporate super-woman. Helping my daughter solidified my passion to help others re-evaluate and correct self-image. I stepped out to life renewed with hope and commitment and launched a company that formulated workshops and retreats for women. I focused on helping women to create a new definition of beauty by embracing their bodies and finding their authentic selves, for a healthier and fulfilling life experience. When we scrutinize the specifics of our mass illusion, what has been designated as physical beauty is only a minor portion of the real woman. That physical part fades with time, yet there are other attributes that last forever.

During my metamorphosis years I studied the work of psychiatrist, Dr. Jean Shinoda Bolen. In her book, Goddesses in Every Woman, she defines a new psychology of women that describes unconscious powerful forces operating within women in the guise of Greek goddesses. She believes that these powerful inner attributes, or archetypes, are responsible for major differences among women. For example, some women need monogamy, marriage or children to feel fulfilled. Others value independence and focus on achieving goals that are important to them. Still others seek emotional intensity and new experiences consequently moving from one relationship or one creative endeavor to the next. Yet another type of woman seeks solitude and finds spirituality means most to her. What is fulfilling to one type of woman may be meaningless to another, depending on which goddess/attribute is active.

I began using Dr. Bolin’s concepts in my seminars on self-esteem. Along with the help of Dr. Don Parker, we created a quiz to help women determine which goddess archetype or archetypes influenced them in their daily lives. During one retreat a “goddess” said that she felt that the Barbie doll had a lot to do with how women felt about their bodies. Since girls played with these dolls as they grew up, they may unconsciously relate to Barbie’s body features as the ideal. I hadn’t heard this before so I began extensive research into the idea.

Now I’m Living It

I started out selling cosmetics and modeling for the same company, and my daughter wanted to follow in my footsteps. She was told that in order to succeed she would have to lose weight. So she became a size 4, and that still wasn’t thin enough. She was in and out of therapy for years over self-image issues. At night I was afraid to go to sleep for fear that she might not be there the next morning. The same feelings of being unattractive and unwanted were picked up and felt by my daughter. She experienced pain to such a degree that she was considering ending her life! Here is a gifted woman who is today is an incredible teacher -- very bright and intelligent yet at one time harmfully distraught in trying to live up to someone else’s illusion of beauty. It is staggering to realize the need to conform can be so fatal to self-esteem – and maybe one’s life!

The Beauty Trap

We are taught by the media and fashion industry from a very early age that we are not physically and financially adequate. Then we live our lives trying to live up to culturally defined illusions of beauty and success.

Research suggests that virtually all women have a degree of shame concerning their bodies. Self-disgust plagues women and girls. As soon as some disappointment occurs, such as losing a boyfriend/husband, loss of a job or failed interview, we often blame ourselves because we have internalized the commercial world’s definition of beauty and compare ourselves to an unrealistic standard. I adore Anita Roddick’s, founder of The Body Shop comment; “There are three billion women who don’t look like supermodels and only eight who do.” Sadly, this does not stop the fashion industry, the diet industry, and the cosmetic industry from promoting products to miraculously transform us into Hollywood and Madison Avenue’s definition of beauty.

Noteworthy findings cite girls as young as seven years old worry over the size and shape of their bodies. Oprah Winfry’s television program has often addressed this issue. Oprah once featured taped interviews of young boys who were asked, “What makes a girl pretty?” Approximately 99% of the boys said, “Thin.” My own daughter fell victim to this mindset!

How it Began

Left a single mom (with two children) at twenty-three without income, child support or a formal education, I discovered selling cosmetics as my means of survival and a personal means of seeking beauty. I began teaching other women to do likewise. Twenty-three years later I stared in the mirror and saw a tired, aging woman who was collapsing under the pressure of attempting to be beautiful every day, in every phase of my life. That day I resigned my position as an Executive V. P. of the cosmetic company, realizing I did not know my purpose for existence, my identity, or a clue of my self-image. Right then, I began my life’s passion of helping myself and other women break free of the cultural and familial traps which imprison us.